“Our hope is placed on you.
The world belongs to you. The future belongs to you.” - Mao
Tse Tsung
Moments when I viewed my grades online, when my heart
sank into frustration, and a part of me burst of regret —
flabbergasted by the numbers that appeared on the computer screen. A little dissatisfied,
perhaps because I knew that wasn't tantamount to all of my laudable efforts on
the academe.
A roster of Uno’s
yet still lacks a .7 to reach the average of 1.25 to be qualified as a
President’s Lister (though I am thankful now being a Dean’s Lister).
It took me an hour to move on from the regret; it took me
countless text messages from my comrades to make me feel relieved. And while
over-thinking of some people I knew who qualified for PL, I recalled my
personal experiences with them inside the four walls of the classroom — my regrets
vanished into oblivion.
I was like a kid on my first month of stay in my
University, confident that this institution will prepare me for life, and even
make me feel safe for the next 3 years to come.
then my first year of college opened my eyes to reality. The lessons were copied then pasted from the internet, the syllabi wholly imitated from other schools, the kind of system implemented a facsimile of, yet again, that from other schools, and some professors teaching inefficiently and
imposing unethical rules, I formed a notion that it is, perhaps, the reason why several students are
academically good yet politically ignorant.
Indeed. To graduate with flying colors is a passport to a
more sustainable future. But what kind of future is to come if the present is
already lambasted with fascist dictatorship, with semi-colonial and semi-feudal
systems, if our present is repeatedly raped by abusive and imperialist nations,
if the present has a cue of an unbearable future?
Algebra, Science, English... aren't we forgetting the Society and
its system? If Society (the out-of-the-box context of it) is just a subject to
be learned and analyzed at school, I guess people will not anymore become
ignorant: Indeed, they will finally fight for their rights; finally realize that they are being suppressed without knowing it at all.
I bet students will no longer be a mere Laude who is
theoretically good yet unable to apply his/her knowledge into practice. If all
are to study society and how our nation and the Filipino people are being
maltreated and abused, perhaps people will demand for justice, and that these
inhumane systems will be changed.
I will never ever forget this one teacher of mine, not
for the low grade that he gave me, but for his alleged accusations that made me
furious at him. I blurted profanities while thinking of defending my right as a
student. I then said to him, “Sir, your
action just clearly justifies that the education system is colonial,
commercialized, and fascist. And that I refuse to embrace this kind of system.”
Some of my classmates thought that I was over reacting on
a little issue. But if only they were aware of the neo-liberal policies that made
the education system poor and dreadful — that made Kristel Tejada suffer and
surrender — if only they knew how many underprivileged youths were
desperate enough to try prostitution and other less-than moral choices just to go to school, if only they saw lots of parents
painstakingly sweeping every corner of a capitalist’s office just to pay his/her
child’s high tuition and other fees at school, I guess they would somehow
understand my battle.
I guess they would no longer laugh at me when I’m
discussing the society’s ill-fated situation, the political issues and how they
are being affected by them. I hope they would no longer react sarcastically when I am
tasked to report the peasant situation in the Philippines. I guess they would
no longer be busy memorizing our lectures while the Union has a greater chance
to conduct a strike. I guess, and hope, that they would embrace our day to day
battle.
And I suppose my professor would somehow realize that all
battles are related. And that we are all part of a one struggle.
Of the two semesters, I learned ‘some’ things. Though
majority of it came from spoon-fed lessons and memorizing the word-for-word
definition of a term that one can also simply defined in a simple,
straightforward sentence, I learned more, and guess where? It’s with integrating
with the peasants and laborers; it’s living in the unfortunate communities,
it’s in socializing with the marginalized sectors; it is being with the MASSES
and UNDERSTANDING them. It is being with them that I learned of the real-world difficulties and how we can solve them — It is with them that I learned the essence of applying THEORY into PRACTICE.
For whom do you study hard? For whom do you work? To live
and toil solely for your OWN satisfaction is like not living a LIFE at all. A
friend once told me, “Mas gugustuhin ko
pang mamatay kaysa mabuhay ng walang nagawa para sa bayan.”
To quote my one professor, “Grades are just mere figures.” Numbers don’t define you. Numbers don't measure your precious experience.
I regret nothing now. I do not regret of not pursuing my
summer job as a call center agent and setting aside the opportunity to earn money.
For I have been working, not for myself, but for the majority and for a better
world, without salary, and through my work I have earned many things more than the amount of a
call center’s income could compensate.
We are often labeled as extremist, as rebels, as noisy
unsatisfied radicals. But the state never affirms, never exhibits, that we are
SERVING THE PEOPLE.
I am thankful being able to go to school. I am thankful
to see the big picture. And one thing is for sure, I
will never stay SILENT and IDLE. Never. Lester May Castillo
